Sunday, September 21, 2014

Carey Needs A Kidney And Your Help!

Hey friends! I have a favor to ask you. No I don't want your kidney but, Carey does!  So let's get him one.

No kidney stealing is necessary! Just like Carey's Community Page on Facebook and share with friends. It's that simple to raise awareness!

Carey Anderson will be thankful and his wife Lisa will be thankful. They radiate good karma and helping them out will make you radiate good karma.
Like microwaves popping Orville Redenbacher Kettle Corn!

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

I Wonder Why?

Random list of things I wonder about.

1. I wonder why men only read magazines in the bathroom?

2. I wonder why people throw off fireworks at 2am on a Tuesday morning?

3. I wonder why old hairy men like to wear Speedo's?

4. I wonder why summer seems too short and winter so long?

5. I wonder why chipmunks hide food they're going to forget hiding in 5 minutes?

6. I wonder why my dogs, after 7 years of the same mailman, still want to tear him to shreds?

7. I wonder why I started this stupid list?

8. I wonder why ADD and OCD in the same person doesn't cancel out each another?

9. I wonder why my black dog isn't bald since he sheds another whole dog daily?

10. I wonder why I seem to still look like my mother dressed me and I'm 52 years old?

11. I wonder why MTV doesn't drop the "M" and just call itself TV?

12. I wonder why if I'm like a good neighbor State Farm isn't here?

And finally...

13. I wonder why you can't press "no I don't agree w/this amount" at the supermarket checkout lane after you've swiped your debit card, is not allowed? If they didn't want my opinion they shouldn't have asked the question.

Saturday, August 02, 2014

Top Ten List - My Top Ten Reasons for Not Shopping at Market Basket

I'm sure most of you in New England have been following the saga of the Market Basket grocery chain, also referred to as Demoulas Market Basket, the Bucket, Munchie Basket and the MB.  A family feud has forced store associates to picket and customers to boycott the store. (Google it for details! It's like a soap opera)

Market Basket's motto is "more for your dollar" and it truly is.  Yeah we pick on it from time to time and some people think it's the welfare store or the gray hair store (mostly due to it's longevity of offering lower prices people shop in their stores for life).  I like Market Basket because of their low prices, friendly associates and managers.  I like their store brands.  I like their friendly faces and I really like how they don't scatter as much sawdust on the floor like they used to - it was a MB thing.  I love how I am recognized week after week, that I don't need to use coupons and when I enjoy a certain item and tell a department manager about it they are nice enough to keep it in stock and even remember my name to tell me when it will come in if it's out of stock.  I am always impressed how many local brands they have.  I am doubly impressed that I save anywhere from $30-$50 in every grocery trip compared to shopping at their competitors.  I don't dislike Shaw's or Hannaford but I don't find their people helpful.  They just don't go the extra mile like Market Basket associates do.  At MB they don't "tell" you where an item is, they bring you to the item.  They stop you when they see you roaming the aisles if you appear lost and help you find the item you need.  The other stores don't do that and charge more.  I dislike walking through faux specialty stores inside a store so they can charge more.  I resent being told to scan my own order only to have to stop every third item because it can't read the bar code or it reads the bar code then charges me $33.76 for a peach. The robotic voice telling me to bag my items sends me into a fit of rage after I've ALREADY BAGGED THE DAMN ITEM!  Associates in these stores tend to just turn their back if they know you'll ask a question or require assistance.

I love my Market Basket!  I miss the good music stores #50, #36 and #71 (oh poor #71 you never had a chance at happiness, you only opened a year ago). I miss my favorite store associates!

Here are my top 10 reasons for not shopping at Market Basket until this issue is resolved.

10. The Board of Directors is out of touch.  They terminated the CEO Arthur T (Artie T) because of an old family feud.  Not because he was incompetent. Hard to be incompetent when you've continued to bring in billions for the company.

9. Your Co-CEO's don't exactly have stellar resumes. Google James Gooch and Felicia Thornton.  Not exactly my picks for co-anything.

8. The blame game.  The BOD and CEO's find it easier to blame associates for their mishandling of the company. You still haven't caught on that associates are working.  The customers are boycotting...UGH idiots!

7. Arthur S. gives me the willies.  He's slick and weasel like.  I apologize to all weasels and those who love weasels.  He just looks like he never could quite afford to buy a personality (which is BS he's a damn millionaire).  

Which one is the weasel? 

6. Firing the warehouse workers.  Or not firing the warehouse workers?  It's all very murky.

5. Picket lines.  I simply won't cross them.  While you're not union I am and that means I won't cross until your demands or reasonable concessions are made.  By reasonable I do not mean a dollar coupon for cereal I mean real change like firing you're new CEO's and Fiduciary misconduct charges against cousin Arthur S.

4. The constant daily threat by management veiled as niceties.  Current employees shouldn't have to visit a job fair to get their jobs back that they never left in the first place.  A company with class doesn't terminate long time employees via courier on a weekend.  Cowards!

3. You're a private company and you may have the right to do as you please but you're constant bullshit press releases means I can't walk into any of your stores. I'm too afraid you'll try to fire me.

2. You'd rather watch a beloved local company, a company that your family created from nothing fail instead of admitting you were wrong.  But shit why would you care, you're wealthier than any of us will ever be no matter what happens.  You tanked a company is less than 30 days.  I see a TV movie coming soon...How to Tank a Profitable Company via Press Release - Lifetime Network, Fall 2014.

And my #1 reason for not shopping Market Basket is...


Until you bring back Artie T and restore all fired employees I will spend my money elsewhere. Even if it means I go to five different stores to do so.

click for slide show.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Summer Yes Summer!

Ahh summer you sweet sweet thing! I'm so happy for your return. Even on the days where I get that little pool of sweat under my boobs I rejoice in your appearance.

During the official three weeks of summer we have here in North of Common Sense we all frolic in our near nakedness. It cools us off and a little color makes it easier to find us in the inevitable and impending blizzard of white crap. This is our time world! Forget your soccer or f├╝tball or whatever you want to call it. We have skinny dipping chunky monkey pool and pond days. We collectively tan our cheeks on both ends. We. Turn. Off. The. Heat - take THAT OPEC!

For entertainment by the light of the fire pit we roast wieners and pull tics off each other while balancing cold Canadian beer on our knees (none of that rocky mountain crap for us). We are brave, we are strong, and once we were even young! We sacrifice countless marshmallows or throw searing hot flaming ones at each other while playing Run Fatty Run. A game made up by one of my psycho family members. We are required to have capital F Fun.

This could explain my lack of invites this summer. I will
for the record eat chicken and fish and cake!

We are fond of cut off shorts w/one leg longer than the other. Shirts from imaginary 5ks we've run bought almost new from the Goodwill near the liquor store, beat up Red Sox ball caps and mismatched flip flops. We may be missing a toe or two by the first week in August but God gave us 7 or 8 more to work with. We smell like an odd mixture of Banana Boat & Skin So Soft.

We shave it, pierce it, tattoo it and tan it! We show it all loud and proud. Our favorite summer game is "Fireworks or Gunshots" and our favorite summer activity is going to the drive in even if that only means parking in front of our neighbors house who has the big picture window and HBO. If we lack transport we aren't shy and have webbed lawn chairs from the Woolworth going out of business sale circa 1974.

So get out and find some fun. Light a couple of sparklers and have a one man speedo parade around the block. Go to a touristy water park and deflate all the inner tubes or toss your kids in the ice cold ocean and get that lifeguard off his butt to earn his minimum wage. Shake it up, don't sit in the shade but for heaven sakes remember to apply your own sunscreen.

Hmmm I'm not sure I'd be this happy. 

And remember whales pee in the ocean. Don't sweat it. It's probably cleaner than the public restrooms.

Ride on summer...ride on!

Monday, June 30, 2014